Thursday, May 2, 2013

I'm glad you liked it, ...

but....

there are limits to some of the teaching I did on marriage Sunday.

Yes, both people in a marriage are responsible for working through the problems.  But there is a limit to how far that goes.  Addiction is the first example that comes to mind.  If he’s an addict, then I do believe both spouses have responsibility to work on that.  She needs to support him in getting or maintaining help and not putting stumbling blocks in his path.  She needs to get support for herself with counseling or an Al-Anon group.  But he has to work on his addiction.  I did not mean to advocate co-dependency.

I didn’t mean to throw my husband under the bus.

In a part of Sunday’s message when I talked about the struggles in my marriage, I came across as too harsh on my husband.  Between the filming of the sermon for Westchester and the live preaching event at Powhatan, I realized some of my language was too pointed, and I made adjustments.  Only the Powhatan campus heard those adjustments; the Westchester audience heard a less funny, harsher take on the hard work versus fun and relaxation tension in my marriage.  

But even then, I could have balanced the discussion more.  If I could go back, then I would emphasize more how my being uptight hurts my marriage and how Sammy’s inclination toward fun and relaxation helps my marriage.  

I was attempting to show that we have problems, too.  My intention was not to talk badly about my husband from the pulpit.  I’m a big fan of his, and I'm fortunate to call him "husband."

We are still becoming one.  We still have a lot of work to do.  We still have work to do on the hard work vs. fun and relaxation value difference I spoke of Sunday.  There's no one I would rather do that hard work with than Sammy Frame.

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